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Latest News
Friday
Got a text from a mate I’ve not seen in ages.
"Do you always use your column to hint for free stuff?"
Reference my knackered Sidi’s. Well, yes. There is no point in denying it.
And guess what? It works cos I’ve got a nice new pair of Sidi B2 Goretex in a dainty size 3...
...For my birthday from Hornet Boy, not scrounged through the Digest.
However due to the Editorial team’s almighty cock-up last month, I think the least the Digest can do for me are a few little goodies gratis so here goes: Akrapovic full system, PCU, made to measure leathers, Suomy Defender Fantasyland lid, personalised number plate and a track day somewhere hot and sunny… for starters.

Monday
Don’t know if you’ve ever noticed it but some bikers have that biker walk. It tends to affect more of the Power Ranger variety of bikers and I think I’ve sussed out why. New boots (and possibly their gimp suit is too tight).
My new Sidi’s are great – much more roomy than the Black Rains and so new that I can’t bend my ankle in them yet so I find myself walking with the very distinctive gait that I used to rip the piss out of others for.
And God, do they squeak? They have the vertebrae system on the ankle and when I walk through the office at work it’s so loud, I think people expect to see an army of rodents behind me à la that pied piper bloke from Hamlin!
You’d think that for the price you pay for these things, they’d slip in a small can of silicon spray, but no such luck.
Anyway, after embarrassingly squeaking past our CEO this afternoon, WD40 came to my rescue. Is there anything that stuff can’t do?

Wednesday
Coming home from work on a gloomy afternoon, I’m waiting at a set of lights between vehicles. As I look in my mirrors before I pull away, I notice the unmistakable presence of a white BMW police bike to my left.
Bollox.
Can’t help but feel guilty.
Next set of lights and it’s there, to my left, still behind me.
Buggerbuggerbugger – I’m sure I’ll get pulled for something.
Next set of lights, and we’re at opposite sides of the lanes; I’m careful not to make eye contact.
Police bike pulls away first and I hang back. Ah, it’s a lady bike copper, don’t see many of them around, and she’s on her own.
Pull up alongside her at the next set of lights (Victoria – fekkin’ nightmare for lights), and as pedestrians walk in front of us, I feel a tap on my left arm.
"What IS that? An R1 or an R6? I’ve been trying to get a closer look at you for ages" a little pink face beams at me.
(I have no decals on my bike; you can only just make out it’s a Yamaha)
"R6", I replied, whilst quietly fuming that I went through 5 minutes of mental anguish cos she liked my bike?!
"It’s gorgeous. I bet you have some fun on that"
Time and a place, officer, time and a place.
I asked her about her BMW, "Bloody ‘orrible"
"So, can you pick it up? I thought you had to be able to do that to be a police biker"
She laughed back, "No – health and safety – it needs 3 of you at least"
Aha! Maybe my theory is correct; they always travel in pairs in case one of them drops it.
two wheel passion
www.theridersdigest.co.uk

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